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Year End: On growing my spiral

Last year around this time, I said that if I was to calculate my creative maturity in snail terms, my spiral growth was just beginning. Snails must eat a lot of calcium in order to grow their spirals. My shell is still very small, only barely growing as time passes. So rather than feel like no progress is happening, I try to focus on finding sources of calcium.

Here are some words that, like calcium, have contributed to my growth.

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Hannah Street Elliott

Ottessa-Moshfegh
Writer
John-Early
Comedian, Actor, Writer, Producer
Jon-Gacnik
Programmer, Designer
Kelly -Vallon
Music lawyer
Sean-Baker
Filmmaker
Katherine-Paul
Musician
Ashley C.-Ford
Writer
Dr. Eve-Ewing
Poet, Author, Sociologist

If the worst that’s gonna happen is you’re gonna get hurt, and you’re gonna be disappointed, it is still more interesting than staying home alone.

We have a great fondness for people that have three-inch-thick masks on. Because that’s us, too. So I think maybe by writing those kinds of characters and performing those kinds of characters, it hopefully lets people have a more forgiving relationship to their own artifice.

When we “walk” the net, we’re moving through a boundless space devoid of touch points. Understanding scale in relation to a space like that becomes a lot trickier. I often think about a line from Peter Lunenfeld, a mentor of mine, which goes, “The infoverse may be infinite, but our allotment of days is not.” We ought to be conscious of how far and how quickly we move through the internet.

There are certain times when those creative options are the best, and then there are certain times when a more traditional option is the best, too. Coming up with those options and then selecting them—there’s some inherent creativity in that.

Instead of getting stressed out, instead of getting all depressed about not knowing exactly what’s going to happen next, I try to twist it. I don’t know what’s going to happen next, but it’s going to be a cool journey, and that discovery is going to be really rewarding.

It really is all about balance, but the balance isn’t between a good activity and a bad activity, or stuff like that. It’s more like you’re trying to find a balance between freedom and responsibility. So, essentially everything that I do is trying to be a little more free. Being able to do whatever I want to do.

I forgive myself for everything that I’m not doing.

About the Author

Hannah Street Elliott

Hannah is the Associate Editor at The Creative Independent.